Do You Want To?

Almost nobody begins a meditation practice for reasons that will permit them to continue once they hit the wall.

If you meditate because you believe yourself to be special, your reward will be to discover that you are nothing special at all.

If you meditate because you believe it will bring you peace, your reward will be to have your understanding of the nature of peace shattered.

If you meditate because you think it will help you manage your life, your reward will be to discover you have no control over anything whatsoever.

Still want to practice? Most do not.

Below is a lengthy quote from an article by Ken McLeod. He begins the section with a Nasrudin story:

One day, while staying at a friend’s house, Nasrudin peered over the wall into the neighbor’s yard and saw the most wonderful garden he had ever seen. He noticed an old man patiently weeding a flower-bed and asked,

“This is a beautiful garden. I’d like to have one just like it. How do you make a garden like this?”

“Twenty years hard work.”

“Never mind,” said Nasrudin.

And then he continues:

“You say you want to be awake and present in your life, but you practice only occasionally, and even then, for relatively short periods. Maybe you do practice regularly, but your practice only goes so far, stopping at a wall that you can sense but can’t name. What stops you? Are you willing to touch that wall, touch it and go into it? Are you willing to be present in any and every experience that arises, whether it be anger, shame, love, success, heartbreak, victory, insult or failure? What do you actually want from your practice?…

“Willingness means you practice living in the world of immediate experience, the world in which there is no time, the world in which you cannot trade or share a single thing with anyone, the world in which not a single person, not even you, exists, the world that is what you experience right now. It also means ‘twenty years hard work.’”
— Ken McLeod, in “Three Questions”, and article on the Unfettered Mind website

Thank you, Ken, for (much more than) twenty years hard work.

2 Replies to “Do You Want To?”

  1. …but wait, there’s more, Ken also said (Mahamudra Class 04):
    “Any causative answer to these questions; I am – fill in the blank. Life is – fill in the blank. Is a stopping of awareness not a…it’s a block. It stops. Now this is very interesting. In one of the great…the genius aspect of Buddhism is that it encourages, very, very explicitly, never stopping at anything. And so all these tools to whenever you stop at anything, it blows it out so that you can continue.”

    Re: the photograph.
    Usually I get the images, but this time I didn’t understand why use the image of an old man standing in front of a moving coal burning train? It took a bit to realize it was Claude Monet at his property in Giverny. Nice.

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